Flannery O'Connor wrote, "Don't let me ever think, dear God, that I was anything but the instrument for Your story. Just like the typewriter was mine." Do you ever forget that you're not the one running the show here? That as much choice and freedom as we have over our own lives, we are not ultimately the ones who make the final edits to send our story off to press each day? I'm pretty much the number one offender of thinking that I run my own life. That everything I've accomplished, I've done on my own. Moreover, that everything will happen as I'd like to write it. When I take a step outside of myself to actually look at the story I'm living, it is so blatantly obvious that this 26 year-long (and counting) autobiography, has NEVER played out the way that I tried to originally write it. Thankfully, God has so faithfully cemented a yield sign at every single point in my life where I thought I could re-write the map on my own. When I look back at the road that I would've tripped down had I disregarded those yield signs, I am eternally grateful that I was granted eyes to see the bigger story unfolding outside of my little self and a spirit brave and willing enough to die to my own selfishness. If you told me 7 years ago that I would be writing all of the words that I just did, I wouldn't believe you. I would tell you that God is a controlling dictator who just wants me to "follow the rules" and be a puppet. No, I wouldn't be one of those crazy people. But with God I'm not a puppet. I've made my own choice to live for a God who I know not as a controlling dictator but as the most loving, gracious, wise Father. I still make my own choices every day. I just do it with the help of a counselor. A counselor who happens to be the most high Mighty Counselor. Don't all of us do this everyday though? We seek counsel from a friend when, "OMG look what he texted me, what do I say now?!" or from a parent when, "DADDDD it just took me three tries to start my car, now it's making a strange noise... and I think my oil is leaking...and I might need new tires..." Or, "Mom, my job just sucks and I don't know if I should stay." How about from a coach, a realtor, your financial planner, a co-worker, neighbor, or an actual counselor? When you think about it, we don't really make many of our own choices until we've reached out for advice and assurance from people we trust. We all have always been in this together. As far as I can see, seeking God's counsel is no different. Well, it's actually completely different because no human being can do for you what God can but, you get my point. In the end, it eases my anxious heart that I am the instrument for God's story. Nothing more, nothing less. It just makes me smile, that He is counseling me through own story so that it may fit into His larger book to bring Him glory. What a privilege.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
Author4th grade teacher. Writer. Justice-seeker. Encourager. CrossFitter. John 11:40. Archives
July 2017
Categories |