I tell my students that to be fearless means to be brave despite your fears. I know, if you break down the word into its base and suffix it literally means to have no fear. But I'm going to dare to redefine it. After all, I've never been one to go with the status quo. I wrote about being brave in my Back-to-School post last year too. I’m starting to grow ever-more convinced that bravery and confidence despite uncertainty is going to be the new school year theme of my mental state every year. I can take a pretty good guess at what my new kids’ fears are right now. Is there anyone else in my class that I know or even really like? Is 4th grade going to be too hard for me? Will I have someone to sit with at lunch? Will I get lost in a new school? Will my teacher like me? (Yes, she will :), and she already believes in you more than you even know.), Will I like my teacher? Will I have someone to sit with on the bus and to play with at recess? Right now my fears are the same as they are every other year. Will I be enough for them? Will I be able to give them what they need to thrive, not only academically but as a whole person? Will I be patient enough, loving enough, encouraging enough, forgiving enough? Will I just in general be able to keep it together (always an uncertainty. Wine and chocolate helps a lot. And CrossFit. A lot of CrossFit.) I’m laughing at myself as I write out these fears because they are identical to every year past, and every year, the outcome is the same. When all is said and done, I never think I’ve been enough of anything for them; despite how they’ve grown and what they’ve achieved. Yet, when all is said and done, they never fail to tell me just how enough I was. I love looking at the letters I have my kids write to my next class. It’s both comical and encouraging to see what stuck out to them. I love even more to pull out the notes and cards they write me at the end of the year. We all need people to remind us of our value and tell us that we matter. When it comes from someone you poured your entire heart into, it makes it that much sweeter. It makes me that much more brave, and ready to confidently go into a new year despite lingering residue from persistent fears. So, that word: fearless. Some use it as positive self-talk, others as a battle cry. I, on the other hand, am not a fan. I don’t believe that it’s possible to be fearless. We are merely human after all. Have you ever met anyone who had no fears or worries about anything at all? I haven’t. I’ve read that fear, worry, and anxiety are protective responses of our brain when we are facing imminent danger. Of course, sometimes (or oftentimes, if you’re someone like me who experiences anxiety) our fears are completely irrational. Yet, having no fear is not healthy. Therefore, I don’t believe that encouraging someone to be #fearless in everything is a reasonable admonition. However, what we can do, is teach one another how to sort out our fears. Which are reasonable, which are not and how can we work to press on despite our fears? Because, I don’t know about you, but when I’m fearful of something and someone tells me to just “not worry” about it, it just makes it all exponentially worse. So, Year 3, I’m ready for you. I’m ready to say things like, “I see that this is worrying you. What can I do to help?” And, “I know this is hard for you, but I’m not going to let you give up.” And, “OH NO! Did I just hear, ‘I can’t?!’ We don’t say that in Ms. Frazee’s class!” And, “I’m sorry you're getting discouraged. Take a quick break, think of something that you’re awesome at, then let’s try this new thing again.” As a student from last year wrote in her LIterary Essay, “If you are brave, it helps you to be strong and grateful. Also, others might be inspired to be brave because you showed that it’s possible to be brave even though you’re scared.” So, my new nine and ten year old friends, I’m ready to help you to be brave (not fearless), to trust yourself and your abilities, and to do your best and be your awesome self. Can you help me to do the same? :)
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Author4th grade teacher. Writer. Justice-seeker. Encourager. CrossFitter. John 11:40. Archives
July 2017
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